My Kids Hate Me

Before I continue, I want to make something clear:  I can’t complain about my night’s sleep.  When I am tired, I am completely to blame.  However, I can complain about my babies recent naptime sleeping–or lack thereof.

I find naptimes to be slightly more essential than nighttime sleep.  See, it is during naptimes that I take a shower, do the dishes, and write.  It is also during naptime that I gather my energy to make dinner, take walks, and start laundry.  So, when nap times are compromised, I become grumpy and my house becomes dirty.

Lately, my kids have been doing tag napping.  You know, when one falls asleep the other wakes up.  It is very aggravating.  It has led me to the conclusion that my kids hate me.  This must be true.  Why else would they put me through so much torture?

Now, if you are looking to excuse my children, it is because you don’t know them.  Sure, they might look angelic,

but deep down they are devious little creatures. I should know.

Take Andrew.  He used to sleep moderately well.  He would at least give me a half hour to an hour of good napping 3-4 times a day.  I can do that.  Lately?  He has been fighting sleep.  After vigorous rocking, he might close his eyes.  But, the instant I put him down–BAM! He wakes up.

I did expect this.  He is 4 months after all.  His sister did the same thing around this time.  It doesn’t make it any easier.

Emily, on the other hand, sleeps pretty well hen she wants to sleep.  If she does not want to sleep, she is grumpy.  She whines and has melt downs when I give her something besides cookies to eat.

After a day or two of their ornery sleep habits, I pout.  I’m pretty good at pouting.  I will put on a movie (I’m on a classics roll right now) and let them go crazy while I sit and inwardly moan and groan.

It’s funny when epiphanies hit.  While writing this sarcastic, and somewhat true, post I realized something.  I really have a good life.  Sure, my kids may drive me nuts with their non-sleeping habits, but I know that phase will end too quickly.  Before I know it, they will be leaving the house.  Then I will have quiet.  I will be able to nap when I want and write when I want. Strangely enough, I’m sure I will miss this time.

I  think I will go and kiss my little babies’ faces.  This sleeping thing will not last forever,  the joy they bring to me will.

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40 Comments

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40 responses to “My Kids Hate Me

  1. unabridgedgirl

    Aw. So true, it all moves past before you know it!

  2. Man! I was just going through this a few weeks ago. I have a 2yo and a 6mo old and when she was 4 mo they too were doing the tag-teaming thing. I was miserable. Thank goodness it’s over–for now. I need that middle-of-the-day chunck for myself as well. I hope you find some sanity soon. And you’re right: soon we’ll be sobbing because it’s too quiet.

    • Yes, I can envision myself sobbing now. Ugh. I hope it doesn’t come too soon!

      Isn’t it strange how at 4 months babies become sleep demons? Really, my guy was sleeping just fine until a few weeks ago. Until he turned 4 months. Hm….

  3. Yes, when it gets calm and quiet…you will miss those crazy loud and busy days…enjoy!!!!

  4. I forgot all about naps! Those things were awesome. My kids are 5 and 3, and sleeping is not a top priority for them.

  5. Claira is doing the same thing! She’s sitting on my lap right this moment, so tired but so stubborn!

  6. Yep, they definitely hate you. Children are hateful little things, aren’t they? Before I had children I knew you couldn’t force love, but now I know you can’t force sleep either. Blast.

  7. I love how this was a big thought process, starting out with the problem, coming to the sweet reflection at the end.
    I have horrible sleepers, and it gets me down from time to time… but they’ll only be little once 🙂

    • Having horrible sleepers is wearisome in both body and spirit. Yet, it seems that the time flies by and, before you know it, they are grown. I’m kind of scared of that. I guess that’s why I write, to face that fear.

  8. Angelic but devious! Love it!

    (And, um, my elder did not nap. Ever. His younger brother, only now and then. Wonder where they got that genetic tendency from… )

  9. You’re so funny, Amber. Yes, they look angelic with those big blue eyes, but the evidence is in: they definitely have a vendetta against their mother! 🙂 I’m sure napping can’t be over for them for good, can it? When they get older, the napping switches around – YOU get the nap and they have to be quiet!

    • No, napping is not over for good. Thank heavens! We are just trying to reconfigure our whole nap schedule. It can be a real drag. : )

  10. Those days are hard. I remember not being able to put the baby down because he would wake right up. And now, only one of my kids takes naps.

    Anyway, I think you’re right. I am almost positive that I will miss the days with little people around me, hanging off my legs and giving me slobbery kisses whenever I ask for them.

  11. I remember those days. Here’s what happens — they learn to go to sleep like you want them to, but then they wake up at the crack of dawn ready to party.

    Which is why I should be in bed now. And why I hope you’re in bed, too.

    • Yup. My daughter has decided that 6 is a fun time to get up and play. Me? Not so much.

      As for bedtime? Ugh. There is only a few hours I get for myself, you know? So, I stay up way later than I should. Not a good idea, I know.

  12. They do look angelic! But you know, they talk to each other in secret and have the whole scheduling thing mapped out while you weren’t looking! 😉

    • I know it!! Like I said, devious little creatures.

      I haven’t told you how much I laugh when I see your new name, subWOW. When I see you on twitter, I smile. Perfect change. : )

  13. Love their faces. This is why I had 2 babies, then waited 6 years to have 2 more. Best of luck!

  14. Nicki

    Have I not told you about my twins? You know, one of them is named Andrew? By the time they were 10 months old, they each only wanted one nap a day. I was at my wits end because one napped in the morning and the other in the afternoon. My solution – yes, they shared a room but the cribs were at diagonally opposite corners – was to put them both down for two naps. Whoever was on a morning nap schedule got into an empty crib and fell asleep. The other twin got a crib full of stuffed toys that eventually ended up being thrown at the sleeping sibling. This made for an easy switch for me when afternoon nap time came around.

    Love the post and your recent pics, Amber!!!

    • It must be an Andrew thing…

      Research does show that giving kids “alone” time is really good for their health. Thus, your crib scheme? Excellent way for them to have “alone” time!!

      I can’t believe they stopped taking two naps at 10 months! Wow! Crazy kids!

  15. Oh, those angelic-looking devils! They are out to make their Mama stark-raving-mad! My kids both gave up naps WAY too early.

    Actually, Miss D. never really napped. She would take these little 20 minute “chicken naps” during the day and it was beyond maddening. How can you get anything done in 20 minutes? It was a grim time for housework, let me tell you.

    • And they are doing a good job of it, too!

      I guess this is when I should give up my hold on housework. Or I should plan better. I think giving up is much easier.

  16. You’re so right – this, too, shall pass. And then you’ll miss it. Really. Take it from one who knows.

  17. Linda

    Hello! New follower from Big Little Wolf. I’m just catching up but as the mother of a 15 year old and 11 year old, it does go by fast. When you are in the midst of crying, teething, diapers, it seems to not end. I find myself missing my infants. Your last paragraph says it all. 🙂

    • Thanks for coming over, Linda!

      It’s funny how we can get caught up in the little things and fail cherish all the little moments, isn’t it? Since writing this post I have felt much more at peace with the whole napping thing. I am more grateful that I get to enjoy their play times!

      P.S. If you have a blog, I would love to drop by and say hello!

  18. I hate the tag team naps. If it helps you feel better, my older kids stopped napping about age 1. In a fall asleep in the day = go to bed past midnight sort of way. I survived, though, and actually get to sleep at night now. It is lovely, and you’ll be there again.

    • You know, Charlotte, I hope that because I am loving every moment with my kids (well…most moments) I can really enjoy them as they get older. You know, rather than mourn their growing up. Did that work for you?

      • I know mothers are supposed to mourn their children growing up, but I don’t. Not really. I love the stages they’re in, but when they’re over I enjoy the next stage. And honestly I think it gets easier (physically at least) as they get older. I love when my kids learn to read, when they converse with each other, when they learn algebra and cooking, become interested in the world around them and begin to question it.

        Don’t get me wrong it can still be stressful, but it is also nice, to see the products of my years of work and sleeplessness and stress.

        The odd thing is that when I think about my older kids as young ones, I see them as they are now. Like I can’t completely separate who they are now from who they were then. The memories get all intermingled somehow. Sometimes I freak out because worrying about teenage mistakes is much worse than toddler mistakes, but I do enjoy it. I have enjoyed every stage.

        I never ever say I wish they could be (whatever stage) forever, because I do not wish that. I wish I can see my children grow into their own independent adults who love to learn, love the Lord, and have learned to find joy in whatever paths their lives take them. If they stayed 3 forever that would not happen.

        No, I love that my children move through the stages and complete them to move onto new ones.

  19. Melanie J

    Nap time is sacred at my house too. I dread the day that my toddler gives it up all together because it is definitely my saving grace right now, especially with a newborn.

  20. Yes! That is such a hard stage. We have just moved beyond it and are back in the land of double naps in the afternoon – like right now. Hallelujah! I know exactly how you feel and the only words of comfort I can find? This too shall pass (and hopefully soon!).

    xoxo

    • I think nap times are one of the hardest things for babies to get used to. I’m okay with that. It usually only takes a couple of months and, before I know it, they are taking great naps. Hopefully together! : )

  21. m&m

    I love what Charlotte said. Each stage is so unique, fun, and challenging in its own right.

    But I admit to sometimes missing the littleness, too, esp not being able to have more as we had hoped.

    Thanks for letting me soak in some of your little ones’ littleness. The feeling of it all stayed with me all day yesterday.

  22. My kids are also devious little creatures who need very little to no sleep at all. It’s hardly fair, since I require so much of it not to be a horrible person and hate the world. I hope their napping regulates and you can get a moment to yourself. Every mom’s dream right?