I have to tell my husband.
Since we have no idea what causes this, I can only imagine how the conversation will go.
Fake Conversation but Accurate Representation of Us Communicating
Scene: Ben is sitting at the computer when I walk into the room.
Me: Babe, I’m pregnant.
Ben: What? How did this happen?
Me: I don’t know! You tell me, you’re supposed to be the doctor!
Me: (Raises eyebrows.)
Ben: (Turns back to the computer.)
Me: Anyway. I think I remember my parents talking about birds befriending bees…
Ben: Wait, you bought a bird!
Me: Um, what? Are you even listening to me?
Ben: Yeah, you said you’re pregnant and…
Me: Obviously this conversation is going nowhere if you don’t get off of the computer and pay attention to me.
Ben: I’m sorry. (Shuts laptop.) What were you saying?
Me: Right. My parents said something about birds befriending bees and that leading to…
Ben: I don’t think birds can befriend bees. That’s scientifically inaccurate.
Me: Well, how do you think this happened?
Ben: (Sighs.) I don’t know but we’d better figure it out real quick.
Me: You’re telling me.
I guess the truth will come out eventually, like when I start puking. Maybe I’ll just wait until he figures it out himself. That always works.
Now how will I tell the extended family?